on healing

long coming

i wanted this for a long time, to know what healing is, healing or even Healing. i wanted to know ever since felix got better, ever since i didn't die.

Healing is, passing through Grief and finding Grace on the other side. It is being cleansed so fully that no matter your condition or circumstance, it is beyond amazing. It is precious, erternal, and True. it is Love's highest order bestowing upon us inner Glory. please it says, know Love.

so healing then, or Healing to be precise, comes from the transit through Grief. this then comports, conveniently enough w/ a long held belief that the most useful i can be is helping people to be more strong in their own self, in their family and neighbourhood, helping people be more grounded and less chaotic, more stable and hence more present, more safe on the inside so they can be more Loving throughout their being and their lives.

Healing then may not result in the complete mending of injured bodies or wounded brains. mind might be off till death but that matters not for Healing b/c Healing must be at hand for all of us or it is not True.

what then is the mending of body and mind after injury or assault? is that not healing as well? of course it can be, small 'h' healing, and yet i have known many young people whose bodies and minds will never fully recover from battles with neurotoxic bacteria or cancerous viruses or speeding 4x4's.

seems semantic

isn't this just a bunch of words from a middle age white dude laid up w/ a broken ankle in a forgettable hotel near LAX? perhaps. i won't keep you, but if you persist, what fascinates me next is what is the use of this 'knowing'?

just say, for sake of time, we grant your supposition about Healing being that what comes to the seeker upon passing through Grief. for me, simple, a) it has allowed me to feel Healing is possible for me even if i never heal past the nightmares, and b) it guides me in where to be useful, b/c i can help people Heal, no matter how broken-seeming to 'experts' and narrowcasters.

i can help Heal b/c it is a natural rite, and my job is to point it out, and to help in any way each person to build strength, a sense of safety, verve, nerve, faith, audacity to go for it, to seek surrender to Love, to become the most mad creative, true person possible. i can hold space for sorrow, for loss, for fear, and together we can let them be, and then send them on their way. we can see them, and allow our eyes to drop the cataracts of fear's illusion.

Glue & Cans

and, it allows me more easily to see God in everyone. this is a practice, honestly, a thing i can sorta conjure at will if just the right circumstance comes of inner space and outer chill, where i cannot help be know that every living being is literally made of God. they are, each of you is, God, All Love, Creation itself. of course when those long moments come i drink them in with a child's thirst, and i make them mine and they become part of my cells. i am Healed again and again.

and, it allows me to seprate the tasks of bodymind remediation, rejuventation, and restoration from the soul tasks, not that the line between is clean. both matter, but it's non-linear, you can Heal before you're done healing, long before, and you can Heal over and over again, even while the limp persists and the pain fucks w/ your sleep.

tidying

i feel a stirring to end this essay well, so here goes. Healing is passing through Grief, letting it plunge through your whole body and all your mind, and coming to Grace on the other side. it is a journey waged and won, with spoils that never spoil. as a note to self, we'll need more on Grace, the process of Grief, how to build strength and a sense of Safety. so yeah, Love, m