the fun of it all

addicts get addicted to be addicts, to being a 'smoker' or 'in recovery'. the buzz of belonging augments the buzz of the original high, gives the user access to a cohort who just might understand.

by describing oneself as an addict, one gains access to ...

a preamble

So herein begins section two of this series of essays.

It's section two b/c something changed this past weekend.

I had an experience of self from when i was 30 years younger, 19 y/o, midwest united states, somewhere btw late Nov and Feb, cold, very ...

trippy morning, now, that afternoon.

orienting.

have metaphorical pen & ink at hand, beverages and tabasco, a hat if i get cold.

1. i feel more grounded than at 8:11am today

2. i worked for that

here's what i did (and here's me feeling blessed and grateful for the privilege ...

trippy morning, tina came down a few minutes before time to get up, i made room.

she wants me to be better which is of course lovely. she talks about my writing, how it's way helping her understand me, and she so wants it not to be the way ...

in general, part one, b/c there's always more

where one of the main characters—in character—discusses his or her understanding of 'addiction', in parts one to many, b/c that's the only way we could send it off.

rule one

i am not qualified to speak ...